[A callback to what he told her in the garden, because it's still true. Of course, making everything better isn't as simple as a few swings on the tire. But that's not what it's about-- it's about helping Leia get recentered. Back to the present. Back to Reverein. She needs to clear her head, and to Marui, that means having some time where she's not consumed by what they all just had to go through.
And a few swings on a tire could be very good for that.]
Doesn't it feel nice? Like leaving your cares on the ground.
[The soothing sway, the sun and the breeze on skin, the liberating sense of weightlessness, like flying. Every return, his hands receive and guide anew, controlling the pendulum of her swing. There'll be plenty of time for hugs, tears and talking later. First, what would really be nice is a mental health break.
[It's not like she wants it to be complicated, or wants to feel this way... but maybe he has a point. Maybe she's just overthinking everything.
She takes a few deep breaths, feeling the breeze caress her skin.]
I think you're gonna have to push me a little harder for that.
[She manages to look back at him, forcing a smile, before turning forward and tightening her grip on the rope.
Regardless of how she feels about Jude, she really does like Marui. He's not replacing Jude, and she's not settling for him. That much is becoming clear.
And, feelings aside, maybe she had let herself get too wrapped up in possibly beating a story that was set in stone. Not much could've been done and she did her best to keep Jude safe. She could stand to beat herself up less for that, but the image of him dying next to her...
She squeezes her eyes shut to force the image out. That's going to take a little longer to leave behind. However, she could... possibly accept that it wasn't her fault. That she tried her best with what she had.
Maybe.
She takes in another deep breath and tries to stop her mind from spinning out of control.
[Perhaps the smile she sends his way is forced, but the small one that he returns comes naturally.]
Roger that...!
[The next push comes with more force behind it and sends the swing higher away from the ground. If it's a thrill she wants for a distraction, he can deliver on that. The next push escalates again, and for all the heaviness that was hanging around a minute ago-- and that will still need to be properly dealt with before long-- Marui feels his own mood lightening with the shift of focus to pushing the swing, and a laugh escapes.
[Though she asked for it, she isn't quite prepared for her request to be acted upon so quickly, and she has to grip the rope tighter, curling her legs under the tire to keep from falling. She lets out a yelp at the suddenness, which turns into a small laugh. Well. She asked for it, and Marui delivered. And having seen his own smile eases some of her doubts.
He's really... sweet. Totally a great guy. He might tease her a lot and be annoying at times, but none of that has actually bothered her because he more than makes up for it by being understanding and kind. And fun.
Not that she'd ever embarrass herself and admit that to him. Besides, with an ego like the one he has, he probably already knows exactly how she feels about him.
It's that attitude, however, that makes her think that he won't be too mad at her. That he'd accept it.
For now, though, she just hangs tight as she soars higher and higher with each push, trying to remind herself that Jude is alive and fine. That the nightmare was just a nightmare. Things that seem relatively simple to remember when one is not overcome with grief. Sometimes brains just need that kind of reminder to get back on track.]
[It's a healthy break for both of them. He didn't make a show of it when he found her, but with the visual of that sword running her through burned into his memory, it had been difficult not to simply grab her off the swing and pull her into a tight embrace. She's more precious to him than he lets on most of the time, at least in verbal affirmations. But he trusts that she knows how he really feels about her in the gifts he finds for her, the affection in his eyes when he looks at her, and the friendship and support he offers whenever she's in need of it.
And he knows, without any verbal affirmations from her, that she feels exactly the same way. Because he sees those same signals directed back at him.
At any rate, hearing her laugh and feeling the solidity of her back on every backswing is a comfort and reminder that the nightmare is over for him, too. That hug is probably still coming, but it can wait until she's done swinging.]
[And it's a hug she wouldn't turn down. She could use one. Heck, she could use a lot of them, but whether she feels she deserves them is another story.
While the laughter is short-lived, she does find the clean air and weightlessness that the swing provides freeing. She steadies her breath, closing her eyes, and tries not to think about much else. It's difficult, of course, because she'd gotten stuck in a loop of grim thoughts and allowing the grief to eat at her a bit. Though, this is only a temporary solution. She can't swing forever, and eventually she'll have to sort out what to say- or what should be said.
As of now, she isn't sure what Marui knows, after all.]
[Indeed, it can't last forever. Eventually, Marui stops pushing and walks around front, coming to stand several feet in front of her with an adventurous grin.]
Her eyes widen. That might be a little tricky. Not to mention she's still not quite herself. Risking a potential injury and doing something silly doesn't quite seem right at the moment. It's not that she wouldn't. But, well. The weight's not completely lifted. She doesn't feel right.
Instead, she stills her body to slow the swing down, waiting till she doesn't have to shout to be heard. She smiles gently, amused, but clearly still troubled.]
Haha, I think I'll pass this time. But thanks for the push. I mean it...
[Once she's out of the swing, Marui switches hands so they can walk up with them joined. He walks towards the stairs leading up to the porch.]
Maybe. When a place is that tiny, it doesn't take much, does it?
[The heaviness is back, lingering just under the surface. He doesn't especially like the bit of tightness in his chest, but that's all the more reason to do something about it for good now. Like that night when Alvin disappeared, and she came back and stayed over. The cozy piece of wall where she sat beside him and shared her grief. It was a bad time for her, but they worked through it together.
[His hand is warm and welcoming, hardened by callouses from his racket. She gently squeezes his hand as they approach his old house together. It really wasn't that long ago, it just feels like it at this moment.]
No, I guess not. I've seen your room back at home.
[Her room isn't much better. In fact, it's practically the same. But she tries her best to keep it light, getting playful jabs in when she can. Even if she feels down and not like herself, she doesn't want him to feel that way.]
[The little squeeze makes him smile a little; it's welcomed and returned.]
Right? It's perfectly clean.
[It's not perfectly so, but he does pick up after himself well enough. He likes to think what does get left out adds more than it detracts. A home ought to feel cozy, after all. Lived in.
It's certainly not a sense to be had from this treehouse anymore. Somehow, it still feels welcoming to him, though. Maybe just the familiarity of it. When they reach the top of the stairs, he pushes open the door and ducks inside, looking around for any critters that might have moved in. Sure enough, under the loft it looks like some kind of gray fuzzy bugs are nestled against the wall. Bugs with... ears? Oh, wait.]
[She wouldn't call him a slob, nor would she consider herself one. There's just a few articles of clothing strewn about in her own room, along with papers, journals, knickknacks and the like. But that's what she considers lived in.
Also she just kind of hates cleaning.
The inside of the treehouse has certainly seen better days. There's dust and it looks fairly rundown despite being abandoned not too long ago. She wonders if it has something to do with dream energy no longer being present?
His words disrupt her thoughts, though, and she casts her gaze to where he's pointing.]
Those are real?!
[They seem to be. They look small and harmless, and her expression softens at the sight of them.]
[Apparently they are real. What an interesting place the world of dreams can be. Marui takes a moment to appreciate the sight-- it looks like a family of them. The thought is endearing.]
They are. Well, it's good this place is getting some use. Must be like a mansion for them.
[That's a funny thought, too, as tight as it is for human inhabitants. Speaking of which--
Marui turns to the table at the front window and gently blows the dust off. Once it's cleared, he dreams up a rich chocolate cake covered with deep red frosting in a rose pattern all around it.]
Ingenious! Hey, you're gonna have some, right? It's chocolate.
[She can't help but smile. Marui's solution to everything seems to be cake. Normally, it'd be hers, too. Nothing like a heaping spoonful of sugar to lift one's spirits and help to de-stress. And she certainly doesn't want to dampen his...]
I... think I'd rather something else first.
[But it's okay to ask for a little physical affection, right? Since she woke up, everything has felt so different; strange and dream-like. The dreamscape itself was hardly a dream, so even now it's hard to tell if they're all fully awake.]
[Honestly, he was sort of expecting that. Marui had to make it for her and had to offer, but experience has taught him that she probably wouldn't feel like eating it right away.]
Well, that's fine too. [He says with quiet warmth.] It'll be there later.
[He steps back over towards her, reclaims her hand, and after a moment of appreciating the fact that he can still do that at all, takes one more step in and simply hugs her.]
[He took the hint. She had been a little vague, still feeling like she might not deserve his affections. Not only had she let herself feel something for Jude, but that steamy makeout session on the couch earlier this month with Marui made her feel a little awkward when she learned he normally wouldn't have engaged in such behaviour.
But his hug quells most of her fears, it's warm and strong. Yet gentle. And exactly what she needs right now. She returns the embrace, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and burying her face against the crook of his neck.]
... And you too, right?
[Because he's real and absolutely isn't going to go anywhere?]
[Marui's hand instinctively comes up and cradles the back of Leia's head once she buries it against him. It was quite the ordeal she'd had to go through for that dreamscape. And she'd faced it, with bravery, determination, and heart. That's how it should've been. The words aren't easy to say, but he's quite proud of her.
Her suggestion, then, is so outside the realm of Marui's thought processes that it takes him a couple of seconds to realize what she's asked.]
Why wouldn't I be? [He asks with sincere confusion.] Didn't I tell you? We're gonna work through this together. You don't have to worry about me going anywhere.
[That's also what she wanted to hear. Regardless of what happens or what he knows, it really seems like he trusts her completely. But that isn't the only reason she asked.]
I know this sounds silly, but I just wanted to make sure that I'm not still dreaming.
[There's so much more to the question than that. But that's not really something she wants to delve into yet. For now, her arms remain firm around him, keeping him close, and allowing his warmth to comfort her.]
[And as awkward as it is, maybe that's... actually a valid fear. Because she's right: they are still dreaming. Like Alvin, he could wake up and disappear without warning. And he'd have no way of communicating with her after that.
It's a frustrating reality. And it's one that would be pretty unkind to deny to her. Always always staying with her isn't a promise he can make to that end, no matter how true his intention is.]
The dreamscape's over... [he starts. Easy confirmations first.] Let's... go sit down, huh? C'mon...
[Keeping his arm around her, Marui turns and guides her towards the spot of floor where a few months ago they'd cuddled under a blanket and talked about Alvin's disappearance.]
[And that's exactly another fear that's been worrying her- one of them, anyway. But that's a whole other issue to tackle, and not the source of her grief at the moment.
One struggle at a time.
She lets out a breath when he speaks aloud the confirmation, nodding slowly at his suggestion.]
Mm...
[They reach the spot, and she sinks to the floor beside him, inwardly berating herself for letting something that wasn't real get to her. But the reality is, this place is as "real" as any dreamscape they get tossed into. These worlds are all something of a dream either way...
She glances at him sheepishly.]
Sorry. I know I shouldn't let it bother me.
[He's going to probably be annoyed that she's apologizing for feeling bad, but she can't help it, and before he can say anything she cuts in--]
And, I know, I have nothing to apologize for, but just let me, okay?
[There's no awkwardness this time getting settled; Marui helps himself to sitting right by her hip with his arm around her in invitation for her to lean on him, literally and figuratively alike.
It's strange how she wants to apologize when she knows there's nothing to apologize for, if kind of cute. Is she feeling self-conscious? Marui thinks back to how she could be earlier on in their friendship: stubbornly independent, not wanting to accept help even when it was obvious she needed it, like when she hurt her leg. It's much different now-- one look at her accepting cuddles in the first place speaks to her growth on that point. But it'd be reasonable to conclude the root source of that mentality hasn't disappeared.]
Sure. You can tell me whatever you want. [He tips his head forward for a better look at her, offering a warm smile.] But you know, you were pretty cool back there. The way you never gave up, and fought to the very end. It takes a strong spirit to spit in the face of a fated script like that. [He grins.] You really showed 'em.
[He's trying to make her feel better. She appreciates it, really. And maybe tomorrow she'll be able to use those words to motivate her into picking herself up. But, today... they get tucked away for safe-keeping. Today, she needs the time to let all his encouragement sink in and settle. Tomorrow will be better.
Today, she just has to come to grips with the fact that she failed. And that her failing had been a necessity for this world.
She nods slowly, leaning into him, practically nuzzling closer.]
Yeah. Too bad it wasn't enough.
[A thought occurs to her, and she tilts her head to look in his direction, sort of thankful she can't see his whole face.]
Wait, does that mean you saw... everything?
[She doesn't recall him there, but then again, her focus had been entirely on Jude.]
[It's not completely true. It was enough, at least as far as the real goal was concerned. Naturally, though, Leia's focus is on the personal stakes, the outcome that wasn't changeable. Maybe not the happiest focus, but probably the healthiest. Anyone who could compartmentalize to the extent it would take to dismiss that experience and celebrate that the real goal was a success had an entirely separate problem. Just trying to imagine what kind of effect it'd have on him if it'd been him trying and failing to save one of his brothers-- it's enough to piss him off all over again. Of course it can't be written off as just a play.
He breaks away from that train of thought, because it's not constructive right now, and instead rubs her arm.]
...Yeah. I saw. When Paris learned of the Capulet army sent after them, he tried to get there first.
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[A callback to what he told her in the garden, because it's still true. Of course, making everything better isn't as simple as a few swings on the tire. But that's not what it's about-- it's about helping Leia get recentered. Back to the present. Back to Reverein. She needs to clear her head, and to Marui, that means having some time where she's not consumed by what they all just had to go through.
And a few swings on a tire could be very good for that.]
Doesn't it feel nice? Like leaving your cares on the ground.
[The soothing sway, the sun and the breeze on skin, the liberating sense of weightlessness, like flying. Every return, his hands receive and guide anew, controlling the pendulum of her swing. There'll be plenty of time for hugs, tears and talking later. First, what would really be nice is a mental health break.
Stop thinking. Experience Now.]
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She takes a few deep breaths, feeling the breeze caress her skin.]
I think you're gonna have to push me a little harder for that.
[She manages to look back at him, forcing a smile, before turning forward and tightening her grip on the rope.
Regardless of how she feels about Jude, she really does like Marui. He's not replacing Jude, and she's not settling for him. That much is becoming clear.
And, feelings aside, maybe she had let herself get too wrapped up in possibly beating a story that was set in stone. Not much could've been done and she did her best to keep Jude safe. She could stand to beat herself up less for that, but the image of him dying next to her...
She squeezes her eyes shut to force the image out. That's going to take a little longer to leave behind. However, she could... possibly accept that it wasn't her fault. That she tried her best with what she had.
Maybe.
She takes in another deep breath and tries to stop her mind from spinning out of control.
Just. Breathe.]
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Roger that...!
[The next push comes with more force behind it and sends the swing higher away from the ground. If it's a thrill she wants for a distraction, he can deliver on that. The next push escalates again, and for all the heaviness that was hanging around a minute ago-- and that will still need to be properly dealt with before long-- Marui feels his own mood lightening with the shift of focus to pushing the swing, and a laugh escapes.
This is fun.]
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He's really... sweet. Totally a great guy. He might tease her a lot and be annoying at times, but none of that has actually bothered her because he more than makes up for it by being understanding and kind. And fun.
Not that she'd ever embarrass herself and admit that to him. Besides, with an ego like the one he has, he probably already knows exactly how she feels about him.
It's that attitude, however, that makes her think that he won't be too mad at her. That he'd accept it.
For now, though, she just hangs tight as she soars higher and higher with each push, trying to remind herself that Jude is alive and fine. That the nightmare was just a nightmare. Things that seem relatively simple to remember when one is not overcome with grief. Sometimes brains just need that kind of reminder to get back on track.]
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And he knows, without any verbal affirmations from her, that she feels exactly the same way. Because he sees those same signals directed back at him.
At any rate, hearing her laugh and feeling the solidity of her back on every backswing is a comfort and reminder that the nightmare is over for him, too. That hug is probably still coming, but it can wait until she's done swinging.]
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While the laughter is short-lived, she does find the clean air and weightlessness that the swing provides freeing. She steadies her breath, closing her eyes, and tries not to think about much else. It's difficult, of course, because she'd gotten stuck in a loop of grim thoughts and allowing the grief to eat at her a bit. Though, this is only a temporary solution. She can't swing forever, and eventually she'll have to sort out what to say- or what should be said.
As of now, she isn't sure what Marui knows, after all.]
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Hey, try and jump. I'll catch you.
[
This is a bad idea.]no subject
Her eyes widen. That might be a little tricky. Not to mention she's still not quite herself. Risking a potential injury and doing something silly doesn't quite seem right at the moment. It's not that she wouldn't. But, well. The weight's not completely lifted. She doesn't feel right.
Instead, she stills her body to slow the swing down, waiting till she doesn't have to shout to be heard. She smiles gently, amused, but clearly still troubled.]
Haha, I think I'll pass this time. But thanks for the push. I mean it...
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Then, how about we have a look inside? Be like old times... I'll even make you one of my genius cakes.
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Bet it's even messier now than it ever was when you lived in it.
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Maybe. When a place is that tiny, it doesn't take much, does it?
[The heaviness is back, lingering just under the surface. He doesn't especially like the bit of tightness in his chest, but that's all the more reason to do something about it for good now. Like that night when Alvin disappeared, and she came back and stayed over. The cozy piece of wall where she sat beside him and shared her grief. It was a bad time for her, but they worked through it together.
They can do that now, too.]
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No, I guess not. I've seen your room back at home.
[Her room isn't much better. In fact, it's practically the same. But she tries her best to keep it light, getting playful jabs in when she can. Even if she feels down and not like herself, she doesn't want him to feel that way.]
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Right? It's perfectly clean.
[It's not perfectly so, but he does pick up after himself well enough. He likes to think what does get left out adds more than it detracts. A home ought to feel cozy, after all. Lived in.
It's certainly not a sense to be had from this treehouse anymore. Somehow, it still feels welcoming to him, though. Maybe just the familiarity of it. When they reach the top of the stairs, he pushes open the door and ducks inside, looking around for any critters that might have moved in. Sure enough, under the loft it looks like some kind of gray fuzzy bugs are nestled against the wall. Bugs with... ears? Oh, wait.]
Heh! Look. Dust bunnies.
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Also she just kind of hates cleaning.
The inside of the treehouse has certainly seen better days. There's dust and it looks fairly rundown despite being abandoned not too long ago. She wonders if it has something to do with dream energy no longer being present?
His words disrupt her thoughts, though, and she casts her gaze to where he's pointing.]
Those are real?!
[They seem to be. They look small and harmless, and her expression softens at the sight of them.]
They're so cute!
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They are. Well, it's good this place is getting some use. Must be like a mansion for them.
[That's a funny thought, too, as tight as it is for human inhabitants. Speaking of which--
Marui turns to the table at the front window and gently blows the dust off. Once it's cleared, he dreams up a rich chocolate cake covered with deep red frosting in a rose pattern all around it.]
Ingenious! Hey, you're gonna have some, right? It's chocolate.
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I... think I'd rather something else first.
[But it's okay to ask for a little physical affection, right? Since she woke up, everything has felt so different; strange and dream-like. The dreamscape itself was hardly a dream, so even now it's hard to tell if they're all fully awake.]
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Well, that's fine too. [He says with quiet warmth.] It'll be there later.
[He steps back over towards her, reclaims her hand, and after a moment of appreciating the fact that he can still do that at all, takes one more step in and simply hugs her.]
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But his hug quells most of her fears, it's warm and strong. Yet gentle. And exactly what she needs right now. She returns the embrace, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and burying her face against the crook of his neck.]
... And you too, right?
[Because he's real and absolutely isn't going to go anywhere?]
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Her suggestion, then, is so outside the realm of Marui's thought processes that it takes him a couple of seconds to realize what she's asked.]
Why wouldn't I be? [He asks with sincere confusion.] Didn't I tell you? We're gonna work through this together. You don't have to worry about me going anywhere.
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I know this sounds silly, but I just wanted to make sure that I'm not still dreaming.
[There's so much more to the question than that. But that's not really something she wants to delve into yet. For now, her arms remain firm around him, keeping him close, and allowing his warmth to comfort her.]
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It's a frustrating reality. And it's one that would be pretty unkind to deny to her. Always always staying with her isn't a promise he can make to that end, no matter how true his intention is.]
The dreamscape's over... [he starts. Easy confirmations first.] Let's... go sit down, huh? C'mon...
[Keeping his arm around her, Marui turns and guides her towards the spot of floor where a few months ago they'd cuddled under a blanket and talked about Alvin's disappearance.]
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One struggle at a time.
She lets out a breath when he speaks aloud the confirmation, nodding slowly at his suggestion.]
Mm...
[They reach the spot, and she sinks to the floor beside him, inwardly berating herself for letting something that wasn't real get to her. But the reality is, this place is as "real" as any dreamscape they get tossed into. These worlds are all something of a dream either way...
She glances at him sheepishly.]
Sorry. I know I shouldn't let it bother me.
[He's going to probably be annoyed that she's apologizing for feeling bad, but she can't help it, and before he can say anything she cuts in--]
And, I know, I have nothing to apologize for, but just let me, okay?
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It's strange how she wants to apologize when she knows there's nothing to apologize for, if kind of cute. Is she feeling self-conscious? Marui thinks back to how she could be earlier on in their friendship: stubbornly independent, not wanting to accept help even when it was obvious she needed it, like when she hurt her leg. It's much different now-- one look at her accepting cuddles in the first place speaks to her growth on that point. But it'd be reasonable to conclude the root source of that mentality hasn't disappeared.]
Sure. You can tell me whatever you want. [He tips his head forward for a better look at her, offering a warm smile.] But you know, you were pretty cool back there. The way you never gave up, and fought to the very end. It takes a strong spirit to spit in the face of a fated script like that. [He grins.] You really showed 'em.
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Today, she just has to come to grips with the fact that she failed. And that her failing had been a necessity for this world.
She nods slowly, leaning into him, practically nuzzling closer.]
Yeah. Too bad it wasn't enough.
[A thought occurs to her, and she tilts her head to look in his direction, sort of thankful she can't see his whole face.]
Wait, does that mean you saw... everything?
[She doesn't recall him there, but then again, her focus had been entirely on Jude.]
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He breaks away from that train of thought, because it's not constructive right now, and instead rubs her arm.]
...Yeah. I saw. When Paris learned of the Capulet army sent after them, he tried to get there first.
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